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Jay's avatar

I was a Plymouth brethren. John Nelson Darby was their prophet. Went to their bible college. I thought that if I went to school I’d be closer to God. Didn’t happen. Several years later as I wrestled with this dispensationalism etc. It was so deeply entrenched in my mind I had a hard time sorting it out. Now 30 years later its clear to me how false it is. There’s something about a system that is so appealing to our nature. Very much appreciate your article. Thank you.

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Kent Houston's avatar

"I used to lie awake at night, terrified that the sky might rip open and my parents would vanish—raptured into heaven—leaving me behind to face the Antichrist. I had recurring nightmares. As a child, I remember running inside from playing outdoors, just to check if my parents were still home. It wasn’t wonder or worship that shaped my faith in those years. It was anxiety. Fear was the engine, and rapture theology was the fuel."

I have never heard anyone articulate this historical version of my young life so perfectly. I would call Mom sick and throwing up at school because the Baptist church across the street would be packed because they were having a program but I thought the rapture had happened and people were flocking to the church trying to get right because that's what the preachers said would happen.

At 50 years old in 2018 I finally had rest and relief from this debilitating anxiety when I was converted. Reading and listening to John Piper helped me understand the election of God. It's taken several years to toss the dispensational and premil garbage. The calmness that permeates my eschatology is absolutely beautiful.

Glad you are on this journey.

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